Earlier this week I had a day where I did drastically more than normal, which does not take much. Normal is getting the kids to school, sleeping until they come home, making dinner and hanging with my family till 10:00 and then hitting the hay to sleep all night. If they had an olympic event for sleeping I would so kick butt! Needing crazy amounts of sleep is par for the course when you have a concussion.
I am surprised that I lasted for two months before I snapped and just had to get things done or go crazy. Accomplishing so much more than normal, put me on such I high that I decided to not just be productive for one day, but to try it for 3. Now don't get me wrong I physically was not feeling good but it was so outweighed by the ecstasy of accomplishment that I could not stop myself. Well, actually I could have stopped myself; I just choose not to. I could feel God telling me that this was not a good idea but I didn't listen to Him.
Now, three days living in productive land, has produced a wicked headache (I just want to cut part of my head off to make it stop hurting), and a leg that aches even when I am resting. Also, the ecstasy has been replaced with confusion, despair, irritability and that lovely overwhelmed feeling . I have learned my lesson, and tommorow I am starting back at the sleep-lots-routine and will just have to accept not being very productive. I know that my worth is not based on how much I accomplish. Jesus loves me unconditionally even when I get nothing done but healing. In fact he is more pleased with me when I listen to Him, and be like that lamb: relaxing all curled up and cosy.